R.S.V.P.
|
Slimeworld & Galaxy Magazine -- All rights reserved -- |
|
Chapter VI
by General (Uncle Claude) Xxaxx
& General (E.J. Gold) Nunan PFC 1st Class Ret.
Professor Woo and me did an xpearimint. Please, please! Don’t tell no one. If anyone found out, they would take away my guard job or have me killed as a pervert. Professor Woo called it a game. But, I know that it was an xpearimint. We used a magnet thing. He called the game “swinging the bucket until the magnet flew off.” We tied a rope round a bucket handle. We used a yellow rope. I wanted to use the yellow floor bucket, but Professor Woo said that for this game to work the bucket had to be metal. We then put a magnet on the bottom of the bucket. Professor Woo even let me put a drawing on the bottom of the bucket. My mommy used to put my drawings on the food-place that was cold. That was before magnets were made against the law to have. Daddy said that playing with magnets leads to xpearimints, and nobody liked a Goober-head. I made the mistake of informing daddy that nobody liked me whether I did xpearimints or not. He accused me of taking my mother’s side of the family. Honest, I didn’t take it. I don’t even know what it is.
I got to swing the bucket first. Professor Woo said he wanted to watch. I think he was just being nice — and not even because I was his guard. I think the game is to find out if the magnet flies off the bucket before you get dizzy, fall down and barf. After the magnet flew off, I did all three.
Professor Woo said that the Earth was like a big bucket, and we were like little magnets stuck all over the bottom. This freaked me right out until Professor Woo sat on my chest and explained that the Earth didn’t spin fast enough to throw us off. I didn’t spin the bucket that fast and the magnet and my drawing flew off. Finally Professor Woo admitted that since the Earth did not have a rope it was okay — that at least made sense.
Professor Woo says that if the Earth slows down we will stick to the Earth even harder. I don’t see what his problem is with that. Fran Kee is almost twice as big as me and he does okay. That would be okay, Professor Woo says, except everything would be heavier — basketballs, rocks, food, and even the garbage cans. That wouldn’t be good. I can only barely pick up the garbage can as it is. If the can is overflowing I have to put some of the garbage in another bag or I can’t lift it. So I guess it would be bad.
This story is published to be read. Include html reference to this stories to your hearts content. But if you wish to include this story in any form of publication you must first obtain our express permission in writing.
|
R.S.V.P.
|
Slimeworld & Galaxy Magazine -- All rights reserved -- |
|